Finding solutions can be challenging. Maybe you don’t know how to start the process, or your children won’t respond, or even if you do develop a plan, their enthusiasm wanes quickly, and you’re left feeling discouraged. You can successfully solve problems together when you pick a challenge or request that both of you have an…
DetailsBe an Ally Rather than an Adversary when using the Powerful Director Parenting Role – After – then skit. When I work with parents, I present an approach I call being your children’s ally. You set limits and expectations in a manner that usually feels like you are on their side. They can still get…
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Most parents of strong-willed children find them very challenging. Parents have conflicting desires between wanting easy-going children, so they will do what they are told, and at the same time, strong-willed kids, so they will stand up for themselves and not be swayed by negative influences. Since this duo personality doesn’t exist, it’s best to…
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As a director, you set up structure to guide your children to fulfill their responsibilities when they don’t want to. Even after problem solving together, they may ignore you or resist your reminders. This is the time to use an effective director strategy. The after-then or work-before-play strategy is one of my favorites because it…
DetailsFor 1 ½ years, my husband and I have received parenting support from Cynthia with wonderful results. We attended a parenting seminar of Cynthia’s because we were suffering from four years of an intense relationship with our teenage son who was then 16. We were raised in China and we believed we should have control…
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We received coaching from Cynthia and as a result, we experienced greater harmony together. Since we have the same approach now, it feels like we are working as a team to face our child rearing challenges. Our relationship as a couple has improved. Here are our personal experiences about learning new and effective parenting skills…
DetailsA successful family is a family where growth has the highest value. Growth has more value than what is accomplished or the final “product.” This means that we encourage challenging our weaknesses without judgment. When we can’t change them, the other family members take up the slack and don’t continually ask, “Why did (or didn’t)…
DetailsMy wife and I started the month-long Accelerated Wisdom Program with Cynthia. We came primarily to open up communication with our 13 year old daughter. She wasn’t telling us much about what she was thinking or feeling and that was a concern because of future potential issues that teens face. At the end of our…
DetailsParents desire to have loving relationships with their children so they will be trusted and their children will seek them out for support and advice. While teaching my parenting classes, it becomes clear that well-meaning parents are resorting to ineffective punishment strategies, which hurt the relationship, because they just don’t know what else to do.…
DetailsDear Cynthia, You have made me aware of how to listen to my 12 year-old son carefully and not diminish his feelings. In some ways I feel like I am really listening to him for the first time. I regret all the time I spent not listening to him. There are years of miscommunication to…
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