I try to control my 14 year-old daughter so I can solve her problems and keep her safe. Isn’t that what a loving mom is supposed to do? That was how I was raised. I need to change and learn how to listen and support my daughter because she tells me so. “Mom, you don’t…
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See if this situation sounds familiar… An 8 year old son does sloppy work with homework. He rushed through it as quickly as possible so he could get done, then head outside to play. The mom (or father) then checks his work; seeing that it was rushed through, she then forces him to redo it.…
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Most parents have a difficult time hearing the “boredom complaint.” Parents think to themselves, “How could my kid be bored?” and off they go with numerous remarks that are not helpful and instead feel hurtful. This is a normal response, we always seek to solve problems, especially when it comes to our kids. “What do…
DetailsSelf-Assessment of the Development of the Four Factors for High Self-Esteem in Your Family Only if children’s basic emotional needs are filled, can they learn to like and value themselves. For this reason, understanding our children’s needs is the first step in creating the proper climate for healthy growth and development. These needs can be grouped…
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Often parents are so stressed by time and energy restraints that all they can think of is how to handle the challenge at that moment. The challenge can range from leaving the house on time, getting homework done, getting ready for bed up to not knowing where your teenager is and your teenager is not answering…
DetailsSpecial Developmental Stages of Girls Ages 9 – 12 Forming an Identity as An Achiever Ages 13 – 16 Skill Building for Self-Esteem Reflection topic: Observe how your daughter is showing you through her actions and words that she is grappling with developing her own identity. Look beyond the tendency to be upset with your…
DetailsThe results were quicker homework time. A couple came in for private coaching. One of their struggles is that their 8 year old daughter takes forever to do homework. They wanted her to do it as soon as she got home. She kept not focusing and dawdling, taking much longer than necessary. The mom kept…
DetailsWhen I work with parents, I present an approach I call being your children’s ally. You set limits and expectations in a manner that usually feels like you are on their side. They can still get upset when their needs are blocked. Yet ultimately, they feel your love and support. I’m in the process of…
DetailsWhen I work privately with parents, I ask then to repeat back to me as closely as they can, a challenging “conversation” they had with their children. I listen without judgment to the words used and the underlying meaning that contributed to the problem interaction. Our approach to get kids to do something is often…
DetailsPractical Suggestions from Teaching with the Brain in Mind by Eric Jensen Motivation and Rewards 1. Part of the problem of low motivation is the way teachers treat students. 2. They do not need to be prodded, cajoled and motivated by bribes, management or threats. Ask yourself, “In what ways is the brain…
DetailsTerms of Use: The articles in my blog are a matter of my opinion and perspective, offered to help stimulate parents' thinking about their child raising and common concerns, conflicts, and changes that typically occur. They are meant to be educational only. Because they are general in nature, they should NOT be used as a substitute for getting qualified professional psychological, medical, or legal help should serious need arise. The resources I recommend are mostly consistent with my parenting approach. Use them at your own discretion as you would my articles. The parents’ success stories are particular to their family situation. This does not mean that you would get the same results. They are to be used for inspiration that by you changing first, you have the greatest chance of creating a positive change in your family.