As children become older, they want and need to become more independent. This turns into a challenge for parents because this emerging independence often means that kids do not want to be told what to do. This separation process can lead to more conflicts and power struggles. It is important to evaluate your current parenting…
DetailsThink Outside by correspondent DeAnne Musolf, in February 23, 2014 Mercury News, cites research that outdoor play should take high priority. “Outdoor spaces give kids more spaces for creative play. Indoor there are only a finite number of things a kid can do. But, outdoors, they’re not going to do something rote — they are going…
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I’m speaking at Tierra Linda Middle School in San Carlos Thursday, Feb 6, 2014. We’ll be discussing how to reduce stress by learning how to be proactive and problem solve together. Step 1 is to avoid communication blocks which keep kids from feeling safe with parents. Without fefeling safe and that they won’t be judged,…
DetailsEach parent-child conflict gives us an opportunity to either teach our children, or to try to control our children. When we use discipline parenting strategies we are approaching the conflict as a teachable moment; an opportunity for our children to learn important life skills. When our children learn how to resolve conflicts, the joyful result…
DetailsEvery parent wants their children to be successful. Our challenge is to provide a foundation of a life philosophy and life skills that allow our children to successfully navigate the inevitable challenges ahead. Let’s help children develop their inherent good and to bring forth their positive creativity. These will forge their indomitable selves so…
Detailsu Which is more important: expediency and looking good for the neighbors, or making sure children feel capable and competent? u When adults take the easy way out — going for short-range solutions, rather than long range teaching — they rob children of the opportunity to learn the skills that children so desperately need to…
DetailsJane Nelsen has been a main influence in my parenting approach. I highly recommend her books. Here is part 2 of her views on discipline. u All human beings (and children are human beings) have the right to be treated with dignity and respect, even when they need to experience the consequences of their choices.…
DetailsViews on Discipline Excerpts from Jane Nelsen’s book Positive Time-Out Part 1 u Discipline that teaches children helps them learn for the future. Punishment makes children pay for the past. u Tactics that humiliate and deprive a child of dignity and respect are means that do not justify the end. u Punitive time-out is based…
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Daniel Siegel, M.D. and Mary Hartzell, M. Ed, eloquently capture my own philosophy in Parenting From the Inside Out The focus on emotional connection first has enriched my life as a parent. My work as a parent educator is first based on improving family connections. Parents can accept their child’s invitation to slow down and…
DetailsFrom A Piece of Mirror and Other Essays by Daisaku Ikeda From the article Fatherhood pages 50 – 51 I heard a touching story about a schoolgirl who was ashamed that her father was a plasterer, while the fathers of her friends wore suits and ties to work. She told her mother how embarrasses she…
DetailsTerms of Use: The articles in my blog are a matter of my opinion and perspective, offered to help stimulate parents' thinking about their child raising and common concerns, conflicts, and changes that typically occur. They are meant to be educational only. Because they are general in nature, they should NOT be used as a substitute for getting qualified professional psychological, medical, or legal help should serious need arise. The resources I recommend are mostly consistent with my parenting approach. Use them at your own discretion as you would my articles. The parents’ success stories are particular to their family situation. This does not mean that you would get the same results. They are to be used for inspiration that by you changing first, you have the greatest chance of creating a positive change in your family.