My article will appear in the December, 2013 issue of Parenting on the Peninsula magazine which is in print on the San Francisco peninsula and online at www.ponthep.com. Link to part 1 As in every garden, there are weeds to be pulled. While focusing on appreciating and affirming your kids, it is just as important…
DetailsMy article will appear in the December, 2013 issue of Parenting on the Peninsula magazine which is in print on the San Francisco peninsula and online at www.ponthep.com. Link to Part 1 When you appreciate, make sure you are not saying words to manipulate your child to do what you want. Let the appreciation stand…
DetailsStudies have shown that people who feel appreciation have greater joy in their life. Imagine how happy your family will be when each member appreciates each other. Imagine less criticism and more connection, caring and cooperation. To make these changes, think of your family as a garden where you plant the seeds of appreciation, weed…
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Parenting for the 21st Century – Building Close Family Connections and Happy, Confident, Caring Kids (2 – 6 years) What does every parent want? A happy, healthy, confident kid! And research shows that kids who can handle their emotions and “bounce back” from upsetting moments actually do better in life. Since feelings fuel behaviors…
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Welcome to the “Chief Executive Officer” or CEO of the brain. The prefrontal cortex, the part of the frontal lobes lying just behind the forehead, is the region responsible for cognitive analysis and abstract thought, as well as the moderation of “correct” behavior in social situations. In other words, the prefrontal cortex takes in information from…
DetailsPatt and Steve Saso have worked with teens for years and I find their advice about catching a teen in a lie keeps the relationship intact and models compassionate behavior as well. How to Respond When You Catch Your Teen Lying by Patt and Steve Saso How to Respond When You Catch Your Teen Lying…
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Parents can have a hard time speaking with authority to their children without raising their voice or using threats. Actually, you lose the status of authority when you resort to these powerless tactics. When Jen was growing up, I had an unchanged policy that I would not buy popcorn or drinks at the movies. Nor…
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Children who are easily distracted, disorganized and have difficulty prioritizing can drive their parents crazy. Out of frustration, you may resort to judgmental statements that start with: “Why can’t you……?” “Don’t you care about……?” “If you’d only try harder you would…..” “When are you going to learn how to be more…….? “ “If you made…
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It takes courage to listen. It takes courage to become close to your children. We have to become vulnerable and feel our feelings. We also feel our children’s feelings. Most parents can’t listen to their children’s sufferings. It triggers their own deep suffering that has been lingering in their emotional limbic system for a long…
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1. Stop whatever you are about to say or do with anger. It will not be effective! 2. Take time to release your own limbic system in a safe way. a. Call a listening partner or a friend to just listen. b. Check in with yourself. What are you really feeling behind the anger? What…
DetailsTerms of Use: The articles in my blog are a matter of my opinion and perspective, offered to help stimulate parents' thinking about their child raising and common concerns, conflicts, and changes that typically occur. They are meant to be educational only. Because they are general in nature, they should NOT be used as a substitute for getting qualified professional psychological, medical, or legal help should serious need arise. The resources I recommend are mostly consistent with my parenting approach. Use them at your own discretion as you would my articles. The parents’ success stories are particular to their family situation. This does not mean that you would get the same results. They are to be used for inspiration that by you changing first, you have the greatest chance of creating a positive change in your family.