Here is a blog post from Daniel Goleman, Emotional Intelligence, on how to change. To change the habit we must first bring it into consciousness again. That takes self-awareness, a fundamental of emotional intelligence. When that leader became mindful of his self-defeating habit, he realized that it was his own fear of failure that made…
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The Strong-Willed Child Common beliefs about self and others I can be a powerful, magnanimous leader OR I can control and intimidate others. I deserve to be treated fairly and justly. I believe that my thoughts and feelings are as important as yours. I may need to push loudly to be heard because I fear…
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Continued by Dr. Stanley Greenspan While many people studying child development recognize that biology and upbringing work together, this recognition has not been sufficiently applied in advice to parents. I would like to propose a potentially more optimistic way of thinking about dealing with challenging children. This new approach focuses on how “nature” and “nurture”…
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You can still learn fantastic parenting skills during the summer at the Parents Place in Palo Alto. All the instructors are highly knowledgeable in their field. On July 18th I’m teaching the class titled Building Your Child’s Self-Esteem and Personal Power. JULY WORKSHOPS in Palo Alto. Go to the Parent’s Place Website for Registration. SETTING…
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Original URL: http://life.familyeducation.com/parenting/behavioral-problems/40419.html Nature vs Nurture: Raising Difficult Children You’re Not the Cause, but You Can Be the Solution Eight-year-old Jessica wasn’t an easy child. A bossy, fussy girl with only a few friends, she frustrated and alienated even the people who loved her most. She threw tantrums over seemingly minor issues – “These…
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Look at your own need for power, dominance and control. Can you allow you child power? Work towards being proactive rather than reactive. Keep in mind the behavior goal you are trying to teach your child. Will your actions achieve the desired result? If not, change your behavior, instead of doing more of the…
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Special Time: Key Points Excerpts from Listening to Children, Special Time by Patty Wipfler, www.handinhandparenting.com The practice of giving Special Time to your child is an excellent tool for parenting in difficult times. When we make the time to fully concentrate on our relationships with our children, we satisfy some of the deep needs for…
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Lines of communication can be opened or closed depending on the adult’s response to the child. When we listen beyond the words to the feelings and thoughts the child may be trying to express, we build a bridge of empathy that feels respectful and supportive. When we respond with our own feelings or thoughts rather…
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Effective team parenting is a key ingredient for a happy relationship between two adults. Conflicts over how to raise children without a means to resolve differences can create a deep and permanent rift. The adults in charge need to be flexible, creative, supportive of differences and committed to find acceptable solutions as children mature and…
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The Value of Negotiable Rules and How to Negotiate From Jean Illsley Clarke’s book Growing Up, Again. Also read her book How Much Is Enough? Parents learn to be flexible and responsive to child’s developmental changes. Nonnegotiable rules become negotiable as child matures to adolescence. Child learns to think clearly and to develop responsibility. Child…
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Terms of Use: The articles in my blog are a matter of my opinion and perspective, offered to help stimulate parents' thinking about their child raising and common concerns, conflicts, and changes that typically occur. They are meant to be educational only. Because they are general in nature, they should NOT be used as a substitute for getting qualified professional psychological, medical, or legal help should serious need arise. The resources I recommend are mostly consistent with my parenting approach. Use them at your own discretion as you would my articles. The parents’ success stories are particular to their family situation. This does not mean that you would get the same results. They are to be used for inspiration that by you changing first, you have the greatest chance of creating a positive change in your family.