3 Approaches for Stating Expectations Clearly and Respectfully 1. “After (when) you do what I want you to do then you can do what you want to do.” This formula follows the “work before play” philosophy. Practice “After (when) you __________________________________ then you can ______________________________________ “After (when) you __________________________________ then you can ______________________________________…
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By Daisaku Ikeda Part 3 The rapid changes in society have left children exposed to intense forms of stress. The cold and unforgiving logic of the adult world is applied unmediated to the lives of children, who are subjected to excessive degrees of competition, selection, ranking and standardization. The dysfunction so evident in school bullying…
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BY DAISAKU IKEDA How could anyone imagine there are people in the world who deserve to be bullied? Bullying is a base and vicious act that can never and must never be legitimated. People are not bullied because they are weak. Rather, bullying reflects the inner weakness of the perpetrators, their inability to resist their…
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By DAISAKU IKEDA Disturbing incidents of bullying continue to make the news. We hear daily of the tragedy of children who, unable to endure the harassment and violence inflicted on them by peers and classmates, are driven to suicide. It is heartbreaking to think of the pain and despair that would cause a child to…
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The Family is Our First School for Emotional Learning Excerpt from Daniel Goleman’s book titled Emotional Intelligence. Why it can matter more than IQ. “Family life is our first school for emotional learning. In this intimate cauldron we learn how to feel about ourselves and how others will react to our feelings; how to think…
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Recently, I was talking to a coaching client and we had a very thought provoking conversation about saying to kids, “All I expect is for you to do your best.” My defiant inner child responded by thinking, “What if I don’t want to do my best? Why do I always have to do my best?…
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Creative Parenting Wins Cooperation Pt. 3 Most parents I coach have never learned that their own thoughts get in the way of solving problems with their kids. Here is how you can shift your thinking and teach kids how to think about and solve challenges. Remember that discipline means to teach. To problem solve and…
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Here is a story of a private parent coaching client of mine. Learning to Listen to Rather than Yell at My Teenage Daughter I am a dad of a 15 year-old daughter who is struggling in school and in following our rules. My wife and I contacted Cynthia to help with managing her behavior. We…
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The parent-child interaction is like an equation. In this equation, a= actions, t = thinking, p = parents, c = child. Therefore, the parent-child interaction equation is: (pt + pa) influences (ct + ca). You can only influence your child’s side of the equation by changing your side of the equation. Attempting direct control through…
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Many educators on LinkedIn have asked me about teaching social and emotional intelligence skills to teens. As more learning takes place in group and team settings, many teachers have observed that unless we help them tackle personal and social challenges, many will never fully engage and will not fulfill their potential. The good news is…
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Terms of Use: The articles in my blog are a matter of my opinion and perspective, offered to help stimulate parents' thinking about their child raising and common concerns, conflicts, and changes that typically occur. They are meant to be educational only. Because they are general in nature, they should NOT be used as a substitute for getting qualified professional psychological, medical, or legal help should serious need arise. The resources I recommend are mostly consistent with my parenting approach. Use them at your own discretion as you would my articles. The parents’ success stories are particular to their family situation. This does not mean that you would get the same results. They are to be used for inspiration that by you changing first, you have the greatest chance of creating a positive change in your family.