We can’t always avoid or defuse power struggles. We are human beings that need to feel powerful. Some more than others. Here are some ideas for reducing the conflict and even learning how to work together for harmony. Look at your own need for power, dominance and control. Can you allow you child power? Work…
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Power struggles can be avoided by using the gentleness of the sun rather than the power of the wind. If your child feels that you are trying to control them; that you are not on their side, then the power struggle begins. Each person needs power. We can choose either a soft power approach or…
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Aesop’s Fable The North Wind and the Sun illustrates the different results when adults act like the wind versus the sun during a power struggle. Read my other post, Aesop’s Fable The North Wind and the Sun to get the complete story. Here are common power-struggle triggering thoughts along with replacement thoughts that will avoid…
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We can often think that feelings just arise from nowhere. When we look at the Think-Feel-Do cycle developed by Michael Popkin, PhD. we see a different perspective. How we think about an event causes our feelings about the event. Then, our thinking leads to our actions. Too often parents try to change a child by…
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The Kids Are Not Alright The Kids Are Not AlrightPosted: 05 Nov 2012 12:00 AM PST Generally, I believe worry is a waste of time and energy. For nearly 20 years I battled what was probably an anxiety disorder disguised as perfectionism, so I know what a happiness killer anxiety is. So I rarely write…
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This article is coming form my perspective as a private parenting coach to several dads. It does not relate to all dads. I want to honor the dads I see changing and share their stories. It all starts with a dad who wants better relationships at home. These dads are willing to ask, “What can…
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How often do you yell from the kitchen that it’s time to turn off the t.v. or come to dinner, or do their homework. It takes too much effort to actually walk into the room where our kids are and look them in the eye and get confirmation. No wonder we get frustrated when we…
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In my earlier article, I showed how often parents use communication blocks without even realizing it. A communication block is a remark or response to your kid’s statement that ends up feeling hurtful to them. Often our thoughts are just, I’m just trying to help, and instead our kids get mad at us. I suggest…
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Mothers and Daughters Keeping the Closeness Learn why the treasured relationship of mothers and daughters is also the most challenging. Explore how to keep the doors of communication open so your daughter allows you to support and influence her as she makes important life choices. November 15, 2012, Thursday 7:00 – 9:00 pm PDT…
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At Mid-Peninsula High School, well meaning parents discovered that words they thought were helpful were actually blocking communication. Their words had underlying hurtful messages. Responding with truly empathetic comments when your teen is struggling is quite challenging. Here are some common ways parents respond to teenagers that actually shuts down communication. Learn why well meaning…
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