Summertime presents unique challenges with children. Many of you have figured out ways to manage your challenges. Some of you would still like some advice.
This posting is primarily a place where my amazing newsletter readers can support each other. I’ll chime in with my idea on how to handle “I’m bored” and getting closer in the summertime.
Here are some common problems.
1. How do I keep working full time and juggle the variety of summer activities I’ve enrolled my kids in?
2. How do I manage my feelings of frustration and taking control when my kids say, “I’m bored. There’s nothing to do”?
3. How do I keep my kids off the video games too much when I can’t use homework as the reason they can’t keep playing?
4. How do I make sure and give myself “me time” when my kids are around so much?
5. How do I keep the rhythm of doing chores going instead of giving in and doing them myself?
6. What do I do if I don’t want my kids to fall behind academically during the summer?
7. How do I use summer as a good time to get closer to my kids?
You are a great resource for each other. Please comment and share.
Here are some of my thoughts.
Problem #2: Kids saying they are bored.
Parents often feel responsible when their kids say “I’m bored.” When you take on ownership when it really isn’t your problem, you probably start giving advice. Even though it’s great advice, I have never heard of a kid saying, “Thanks Mom. That’s a great idea.”
Problem #7: How do I use summer as a time to get closer to my kids?
Our tendency is to want times with kids to be pleasant. If we are out all day and then they have a melt down, we can feel angry and think why did they ruin a great day? I want to offer a different perspective. Instead think, we had a fun time, they kept it together and now they need to let it go. instead of seeing this as a “bad” end to the day, I’m going to see it as an opportunity to get closer.
We get closer when we share hard times. You become their rock, their stability when they can be emotional and you can handle it. This teaches your children that they can handle feelings and get through their hard emotions as well.
One article that discusses how feelings can be unknowing discounted is Listening to Emotions without Discounting Feelings
Please share your thoughts, questions, and solutions so everyone can have a successful summer with their children.
©2015 Cynthia Klein, Bridges 2 Understanding, has been a Family Success Coach since 1994. She works with parents and organizations who want more cooperation, mutual respect and understanding between adults and children. Cynthia presents her expertise through speaking and private parenting coaching sessions. She writes the Middle School Mom column for the Parenting on the Peninsula magazine. She works with parents of 4 – 25 year-old children. Contact Cynthia at bridges2understa.wpstagecoach.com, cynthia@bridges2understanding,com, or 650. 679.8138 to learn more about creating the relationship you want with your children.