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Parenting is an Opportunity for Personal Growth

Parenting is an Opportunity for Personal Growth

I didn’t realize how much personal growth I would have to go through in order to become a parent I was proud of.

Like every other parent, I made mistakes. My pride comes from being a parent who continually self-reflects and tries to learn from my challenges with my daughter.

Rearing children is an opportunity to stretch your potential and to reflect upon your current beliefs about the parent-child relationship.

Discard beliefs, thoughts and values that cause separation and suffering for you and those around you. Invite in those that create a family of mutual support and growth.

Here are some self-reflective questions to help you uncover problem areas.

  • Am I taking time to sit and listen to my child without interrupting and giving advice?
  • What am I saying words  that is making my child stop talking to me?
  • Am I trying to control my child by making him “suffer” in order to change the behavior?
  • Why do I hang on to the belief in punishment?
  • Am I afraid of losing my “sense of power”?
  • Am I trying to change my side of the think- feel-do cycle or the child’s?
  • Why do I keep the negative cycle going? What do I get out of it?
  • What feelings are getting triggered from my own childhood?
  • Am I trying to figure out how my child can get their needs met in a positive way instead of taking their behavior as a personal affront?
  • Do I know how my child needs to mature in order to get new freedoms from me?
  • Am I looking at my child’s growth as a process that takes time
  • Am I forgiving myself when I make a poor decision and try again?

To me, a successful parent is one who continually strives to improve themselves and the relationships in their family. I feel no judgment towards parents because of their children’s behavior.

My daughter liked to be in “risky” situations as a teen. She didn’t think they were risky, yet I did. If I judged my parenting by how much my daughter followed my rules when she was a teenager, I would probably get a C-.

Yet we remained close and loving through the teen years and into young adulthood. Our struggles together actually deepened our trust and love for each other.

So, I encourage you to embrace being a parent as an opportunity for personal growth and value your tears and talks.

Have you noticed that going through struggles together has strengthened your bond? Is this a skill you would like to learn how to do?

Check out my :

Limit Setting Skill Level Quiz for Parents

Read about how to Parent as an Ally for Success

Copyright 2015 Cynthia Klein, Family Success  Coach,, 650.679.8138. Contact Cynthia for private coaching or speaking to learn how to create more harmonious families.

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