What is your vision of a peaceful home? What does it feel like, sound like and look like? Take a moment to think about your vision. Perhaps in your more peaceful home your kids get along better, perhaps they don’t dawdle in the morning so much or perhaps you are more patient and calm.
I encourage you to pick one aspect of your vision and work on making the necessary changes to achieve your goal. Wishing and hoping doesn’t make changes. Getting mad at your children and wanting them to change doesn’t help either. The power is in you. With new knowledge and the determination to practice your new skills over and over again, you can reach your goal.
The question becomes, how much do you want a peaceful home? How much are you willing to put the time and effort into creating a happier life for yourself and your family? I know you can change your undesirable family patterns because I was able to change my angry and controlling reactions to my daughter. I wanted to feel close and that is what I created through my own parent education
Here are some suggestions on what new information you’ll need in order to change parenting beliefs and habits that aren’t working for you.
|Children fighting with each other.
|Learn how to teach the skill of problem solving. Don’t expect them to figure out how to solve problems on their own. Learn how to listen to emotions.Learn how to stop from saying hurtful words to your children who could then take out their hurt and anger on each other.
|Yelling at your children and feeling guilty afterwards.
|Delve into the thoughts and feelings you have behind the yelling. How much is triggered by your childhood experiences? If needed, receive professional help to sort out your old feelings that may be intensifying your current reactions to your children. Learn more compassionate thoughts to replace your current thoughts so you can become more patient and understanding.
Learn how your emotions can be managed. You don’t have to be a victim. Your emotions are a result of beliefs. Work on changing your beliefs and thoughts and in time, you will be able to manage your reactions and teach your children how to manage their own as well.
You are parenting with skills you learned while experiencing your parents raising you. Isn’t it time to take charge and create the family relationships you want to experience each day? There is no better time than today. The information is available and just waiting for you to embrace the learning and make this year one step closer to the family of your dreams.
©2012 Cynthia Klein has been a Certified Parent Educator since 1994. She works with dads, moms and organizations who want more cooperation, mutual respect and understanding between adults and children of all ages. Cynthia presents her expertise through speaking, webinars, and private parent coaching sessions. She is a member of the National Speakers Association and writes the Middle School Mom column for the magazine Parenting on the Peninsula. Contact Cynthia at bridges 2 understanding, bridges2understa.wpstagecoach.com or call 650. 341.0779.