Once we have children our lives change. A couple that was happily married now usually have more conflict. How to raise the children is a point of contention. We may even wonder at times if we were wise to even have children.
During times of doubt, I remember how much my daughter has given me so many opportunities for personal growth. Jen is 24 years old today. She has told me that I am lucky she was so challenging because these experiences have made me the great parent educator that I am today. So, I appreciate having a challenging daughter. I am so thankful that I stuck by her during the difficult times. We have build an unbreakable bond because of my constant support.
Adults without children don’t experience the ego being constantly challenged in the same way. Our children at times show amazing love, and then the next moment they are saying “No”, you can’t make me. We suddenly loose our importance. We no longer are their number one.
And yet, underneath their need for self-determination and independence, our unconditional love gives them the solid foundation they need to soar in this world. In the same way, I needed the constant challenges of figuring out how to parent to learn how to be more compassionate and understanding. I have had friends tell me I am nicer since having Jen.
So this weekend, my husband and I are visiting our daughter and having Thanksgiving at her boyfriend’s parents house. I know we have been successful because she is adored by his family. When others tell you how wonderful your kids are even though they don’t comply at home; know you have succeeded as a parent.
Happy Thanksgiving and thank you for creating world peace in your home.
Cynthia Klein has been a Certified Parent Educator since 1994. She works with dads, moms and organizations who want more cooperation, mutual respect and understanding between adults and children of all ages. Cynthia presents her expertise through speaking, webinars, and private parent coaching sessions. She is a member of the National Speakers Association and writes the Middle School Mom column for the magazine Parenting on the Peninsula. Contact Cynthia at bridges 2 understanding, bridges2understa.wpstagecoach.com or call 650. 341.0779.